Mindstate Motivation Blog

Listen a Lot to Build Trust a Lot

b2ap3_thumbnail_IMG_1013One absolutely critical method for building trust is through the powerful use of the skill of listening.  Listening effectively is a learned skill.  However, too often, we tend to think if we’re listening we’re losing control of getting our point across in a particular conversation.  The converse of that being by talking we maintain control.  Nothing could be further from the truth!  The fact is to help a person buy into what you are saying you have to truly listen to what s/he is saying.  The more you effectively listen…the more you know…the more you know the greater your control over the outcome of the conversation. You have to turn out and tune in, so to speak.  That requires focusing your full attention on the other person in the conversation.  It means being silent and taking the time to listen.

Listen for the real message.  Listen for content, the facts, ideas or feelings.  Take notes when receiving a lot of information.   Avoid judging or evaluating while listening.  If you’re doing either of those things it means you’re really thinking about how you are going to respond.

Along with the verbal is your responsibility to pay attention to the non-verbal cues your conversation partner is giving you.  Listen with your eyes, so to speak.  The other person’s body language can help you hear a great deal of what they are thinking.   Listen actively by nodding; looking at the speaker…after all, our eyes were made to communicate with people not the wall behind them.

A key to having good outcomes from any conversation is through gaining the trust of those included in that conversation.  Being a good listener is the most powerful tool you have in that regard.

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